Action Over Exposition

Keep It Moving (Whatever "It" Is)

Here’s what you get in every issue of Into the Storymaze: writing insights or a work-in-progress; something creative I’m digging; a highlight from my comics-writing credits; plus a quote that’s got me thinking — both about right now and what’s next.

Twisty Little Passages

Another creative avenue is the Street Writers podcast I do with writer pal Mark Bellusci. We spend 10 minutes talking/laughing/rambling writing, and always find a technique that is something practical to keep us going back to the keyboard. I’ve let the magic of AI transcribe our “wisdom” from a particular episode, on the subject of action vs. exposition. Regarding the images up top: that’s not a tribble on Mark’s mic, it’s a fuzzy windscreen. (You never know when gale force winds are going to kick it indoors.) As for my ostentatious gear, it’s a clear technology overcompensation for my lack of — something, I’m sure!

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Dan: It's a variation on the classic writing idea, especially for screenplays, but anything: show don't tell. And that's advice that's always good to make your writing come more alive. Maybe a little bit more compartmentalized, an easier way to think about it is, action over exposition. Anything you write you have a tendency to overwrite and over-explain. “And let me describe this to you…” — much as I'm doing now!

“Let me explain, let me ‘mansplain’ this to you…” Let’s go with the idea of describing a character and saying, “Ralph was this tiny, fussy little man…”—  and there you have it. All right, I’ve told you what Ralph is, but — so what? Let's give Ralph a life. Let's get into Ralph — in action. 

“Ralph delicately pulled over the step stool to see himself in the mirror. He took one step up at a time, carefully reaching the top. He pulled out his comb, dipped it in lavender oil and glided it through his locks to create that just so twist that meant everything.” And you could go on from there, but now…Ralph is a tiny, fussy little man, without having to say those things.

Mwabonje via Pexels

And it works in everything. It works in screenplays, works in comics, works in business speak. Somebody sent me a thing they're working their way through, an article; an earnest effort, but it was just detail, detail, detail. And all they need to do was bring the moments to life and put a person in the middle of those situations, and go on about what that person's doing — and it'll change the whole dynamic of it.

Mark: Personify it, right? Bring the human element into it. I mean, how many articles will you read in the New York Times where they want to get across affordable health care, or buying groceries during  COVID time, and they start with the person? They always start with, “Jane’s taking care of her mother, who's recovering from COVID, and she has to get up at 4:00 AM and drive to wherever, and she wears a mask…but at least she has a cup of coffee that she can enjoy with her friends.”

So you personify it. And empathize.

Dan: I would twist that a little bit more to go with the action of Jane. It's putting Jane in the middle of that. Instead of, “Jane is a woman who has an 80 year old mother, and Jane gets up at this time…” It's more, what are the steps? “Jane's alarm clock goes off at 4:00 AM. She rolls out of bed in the dark to not wake her out-of-work husband, searches for the slippers, pours the first of 32 cups of coffee for the day…”

You fall into that, “Let me describe this to you.” As opposed to bringing it to life as a persona, a set of actions and activities. And who knows where it leads you? It takes you into the middle of the story and surprising yourself.

Mark: A classic example is Pulp Fiction. As much as everybody and rightfully so loves that movie, if you bring up the whole conversation between John Travolta and Samuel L. Jackson, of what do they call a quarter pounder in Europe — that tells you more about the kind of inane personalities of these two, and how they can compartmentalize the sociopathic murdering of people.

And then they just immediately come down to these banal observations that are obviously very funny. But it tells you more about those characters than you saying, “And they could shoot somebody and then two minutes later discuss hamburgers or foot massages or whatever.”

Now I have to go comb my hair with lavender oil.

Treasure Seekers

I've watched the "World of Tomorrow" many times, and it never ceases to surprise and amuse and amaze. This 16 minute short is driven by stick drawings and only 2 characters, but it's densely packed with sci-fi concepts that most "real" science fiction epics can only dream they want to be when they grow up. A badly broken clone from a way out future comes back to the past to trade observations on time, mortality, love, space colonies, hope and hopelessness with its original DNA, a toddler named Emily. The dour future Emily is jaded and cynical, and her contrast with the childish whims of Emily Prime are both hilarious and profound. Find it on the interwebs. While you're enjoying that, I'll be eagerly tracking down the two sequels, and would not be surprised to feature those here as well.

The Comics Labyrinth

I never quite thought this cover quite worked as well as it might. It’s a great Cap (“Yeah, that’s what we call him, Captain America, Cap…”), but he’s so overwhelming — and it’s Daredevil’s book, after all. I’m not sure what the relationship between them is, how it relates to the incidents of the story.… maybe artist Scott McDaniel and I needed to talk more about this one. (We didn’t always cover-off on the covers, most times I was just wowed.)

This was from the “Tree of Knowledge” story, which explored a lot of digital themes early on in the tech era. I was definitely letting my own interests in all that take me and the character down a path of reinterpreting DD’s “street” as a bit more “hacker.” (We got a nice little write-up in Wired magazine, which I held up as good press for… well, well past its expiration date!) I think the story was actually pretty prescient in a lot of ways, and I dig the beats even a lot more than the better known “Fall from Grace” that preceded it. But I don’t know that it was a favorite of Scott’s.

(Had a fun time recently climbing the Tree of Knowledge (or getting down to its roots) with the guys from Bad For Your Health Entertainment. Check it out here: https://fb.watch/5fK-_wcNjl/)

Web of Intrigue

“The future is an ever-shifting maze of possibilities until it becomes the present.”
— Terry Brooks

Amazing Times

How’d we end up here together? Maybe a detour off the dark web! But I’m hoping it’s because you subscribed to this share-out of projects I’m working on plus things that have me jazzed. I’m D.G. Chichester. Which sounds very pretentious, and tweed jacket and pipe — so feel free to just call me “Dan”, and have a go at the last name as Chai (like the tea) Chester (just like it looks). I earned my word-cred writing comic book titles like Daredevil, Terror Inc., Nick Fury Agent of SHIELD and Clive Barker’s Hellraiser, along with all manner of digital widgets and websites in the world wide web of advertising. I keep my storytelling cred by trying new things —  this is one of ‘em, with more on the way. I like weird and sometimes creepy tales, so if things here bend that way — now you know why!

Folks seem to like the comic book adventures I’ve written, so if you haven’t checked one out — please do. Many are now available in fab collected editions.

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